How to Bribe a Member of Congress in Three Steps

Corruption, Government
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Step One: Contribute the maximum as an individual, then call staff and tell them you would like to become a bundler.

Step Two: bundle no less than $90,000, most of which will not appear to come from your corporation–you provide the secret list of who contributed at your direction.  Make it clear that you understand that 5% of every delivered earmark is due as contributions within 90 days of delivery.

 

Step Three:  provide the Member with stock options and insider information worth at least $90,000 a year.  Use information easily converted into money in our thoroughly corrupt system of governance.

Once bribed, the Member is a well-behaved pet able to do simple tricks, such as insert 200 pages of lobbyist-written deregulation into a banking bill five minutes before the vote.  Since all but a handful of other Members are pets also, they will “go along” with this utterly insane aspect of passing “laws” no one has read.

NOTE:  There is no difference between Republicans and Democrats when it comes to corruption.  One bird, two wings, same lack of integrity.

That’s all there is to it.  Don’t have the money because unemployment is at 22.4%, 46 million are on food stamps, the middle class is visiting charity pantries, and the poverty line is moving toward 20%?  Sucks for you.  God does not like you.  You must have been very bad in a former life,  Rich people are rich because they are geniuses that work hard, not because they lie, cheat, and steal.  Or so the story goes….

See Also:

Congressmen are Paid to Vote for War

Pentagon Has Never Won a War Since 1945 – Advice to Candidates